T-H-A-N-K-F-U-L

I meant to make a list of what I am thankful for this Thanksgiving last week, but got caught up in getting ready to go out of town and never got around to it. We had a nice Thanksgiving weekend back in Kansas but of course didn't get to see nearly everyone we wanted to see! Since we've been back we have been dealing with the "crud" that is going around. It really is pathetic to see us all not feeling good together and wondering, "WHO is going to take care of WHO?"

We had a nice time relaxing with our families and got to sneek in a few other things too. Shaner got to meet up with the guys for dinner one night, and breakfast another day. We all got to go see Jen and Jake's new baby, Carter Joann, who is only 3 weeks old. Congratulations Jen and Jake. She is beautiful!! Thanks for letting us come love on her for a bit.

Here's a picture of Jen at her shower. Isn't she just the cutest little pregnant thing you have ever seen?! Baby Carter. And here's Brinn and me getting our baby fix!



Brinn also got a nice treat from Aunt Sami - horseback riding! One of Sam's friends, Karen, has two horses and invited us out to go riding. I HATE cold weather and it was freezing out, but anything for the kids, right??? Brinn enjoyed herself thouroughly. Thanks Sam and Karen!

Here's Sam and I getting ready to brave the cold for the kiddos. Actually, Sam doesn't mind the cold as much as I do. She is just as horse crazy as Brinn!
Brinn all ready to ride! The two horse nuts - Aunt Samantha and Brinn. Cousin Nick on Ranny.
Brinn on Adidas.

So, now on to my thankful list. After all, any day is a good day to be thankful, right? Even in light of the very challenging year we have had, and although I do get down from time to time, I do realize we still have A LOT to be thankful for and I try not to forget it.

T = TIME. I am thankful for time because I do believe that time helps ease the pain of all wounds. Although I don't think I'll ever be completely "healed" from losing all our babies, I know that I am much better than I was six months ago. I can now stop feeling sorry for myself and think about the beautiful little souls they are and look forward to being reunited with them one day.

H = HUSBAND. I am thankful for my husband because he truly was my PARTNER this year. It is easy to be together when times are good, but when you feel like you are loosing everything you find out the true character of your relationship. Throughout this last year we found that we can support each other and be strong for one another when it really counts. Minor things that used to "ruffle our feathers" don't even make us blink now.

A = America. I am thankful I'm an American. Even in times like now, I believe we still live in the best country imaginable!

N = Naysayers. What? I'm thankful for naysayers? Sounds strange, but yes I am. Anyone who goes through fertility and gets pregnant with high order multiples gets either direct or indirect comments on what they should/shouldn't have done, what the should/shouldn't do, what kind of person they are/aren't. Hearing these comments gives us a chance to evaluate our own convictions. It allows us to either change our actions or stand by our beliefs and say, "Thank you for your thoughts, now off you go."

K = KIDS. I am thankful for each and every one of my kids because they have each taught me valuable lessons. Angel taught me every life, no matter how small, counts. Owen reminded me that when all odds are against you, fight fight fight. He hung on so much longer than any doctor told me he would. Andrew and Hope reminded me that sometimes life isn't fair, no matter who you are. They were developing perfectly, their water wasn't broken, no one purposely ended their life, they didn't just stop developing, and yet they still are not here. Sometimes there aren't answers to the question, "WHY?" And of course, Brinn teaches me something everyday! I love the way she so innocently looks at life with new vigor each day. She has taught me to love deeper than I could ever imagine. There are just no words.

F = FAMILY and FRIENDS. I am especially thankful for my family and friends that really stood by us this past year. Every once and a while you will have a situation occur in your life that really defines your relationships, and this was that year for me. I am so thankful for all the people in our lives that prayed for us, took care of us, that were really concerned about our emotional well-being. There's also those strangers that heard of our story and reached out to help us and pray for us, that I now consider friends. Thank you so much!

U = UNDERSTANDING. This one kind of goes along with the one above. I am so thankful for those who truly understood our situation and empathized with us this past year.

L = LORD, OUR SAVIOR, JESUS CHRIST. I am thankful to Jesus, who has been my rock this past year. I know He has a plan for me and there is a reason this year has unfolded the way it did - although I'm not sure what it is yet (I'm just going along with it)! I am thankful that he gave his life for my sins so that I may see my babies one day again.